Good Luck Grandma's Marathoners!--Cyclops 2.12


Wow! Isn't it amazing how fast Grandma's marathon creeps up on us every year? I always like to put Grandma's on my calendar so I can truly suffer for four or five or six hours. The way I see it, once you've utterly destroyed yourself the way you only can at a marathon, you're ready for the Birkie.


However, much to my utter disgust, I'm not going to be able to run Grandma's this year. You see, the prospect of my wife being pregnant caused me to freak out and decide that I couldn't just hustle for money anymore. So I signed up for a fast track teacher licensure program (because everybody who has ever met me says, "man...THAT guy should be molding the minds of our next generation"). Well, this program only meets like four times in the summer, but OF COURSE one of the days had to be on Grandma's Marathon (at least it wasn't on the day of Mike Lundeen's wedding)! I went up to the teacher and asked if I could skip the class and make up for it later somehow...but of course she couldn't conceive of that happening so I'm stuck not doing the marathon.

But you know...it's a totally lame excuse and I know I'm just going to be sick to my stomach all day Saturday. The worst part is that once I found out I wasn't going to be able to do Grandma's I pretty much stopped training for it (and in all reality, the training is far more important than the actual event). You NEED something like Grandma's marathon sitting and staring at you from a distance like some angry, fire breathing beast to motivate you. You have to be TERRIFIED of the prospect of HOURS of HORRIBLE pain to get you to not eat that last donut, or to run an extra 10 K that evening before settling down to watch some reruns of Jeopardy.

So here I am...NOT in shape and NOT about to go up and do Grandma's. I'm not going to be able to drive up there the night before and enjoy the expo and get all jittery as I pick up my number. I'm not going to be able to scrounge around for some place to sleep, or suffer through a wet night at Pattison state park (I should tell you about that some time). I'm not going to have to decide at 6 AM whether I should take the buses or the train to the starting line (pssst...take the buses). And I'm not going to be able to suffer through 26.2 miles with a bunch of other wackos and experience that finishing euphoria at the end as I stand in waist deep Lake Superior freezing water.

Man...NOT doing Grandma's SUCKS! So for all of you out there who ARE doing it, congratulations! Make sure you send me plenty of photos and plenty of race stories about your day (I want to hear EVERYBODY'S race adventure, from first place to last)!

But, since Grandma's is still a few days away, here are some other marvelous events you can read about:

Mountain Bike Trail Profile: Theodore Wirth Park, Minneapolis, MN

Bike Tech Video: How to Install Handlebar Tape

Ski Tech: The NEW Salomon Pro Pulse Classic Binding

Bike, Run, and Rollerski Trail Profile: Gandy Dancer Trail

Blogger's Back Up and Running!

More CyclovaXC Team rides in the Rain

Allan Shows me Where He Put His Foot Through His Rear Wheel

What Does the Name CyclovaXC mean?

Please! No Games of "Grab-Ass" on Team Rides

Member Profile: David Landgraf

Track Stand Frank

How To Clean Your Bike Jersey

Watermelon, Nectar of the Cycling Gods

Bike Doping?

That's it! Remember to drink a beer at about mile 20 at Grandma's. The carbos take you home and the alcohol dulls the pain! Good luck!

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