Why Do Ski Hats Have Tassels?

I hope you didn't click on this article thinking that I was going to have an answer for you.  The title was "Why do ski hats have tassels" QUESTION MARK!  What that means is that I don't have any clue why our ski hats have tassels.  I just wear hats with tassels because I'm such a conformist (as everybody who knows me is so fond of saying).  If everybody I knew jumped off a bridge, I'd do that too.

Well, I suppose since I got everybody wondering, I should provide some possible reasons that we have tassels on our ski hats.

1.  Because skiers are such fun, festive, party people...we need tassels just like exotic dancers!

2.  So that if your hat gets suck down at the bottom of your ski bag, you can reach down and pull it out by the tassel.

3.  To tell you when you're leaning too far forward and destroying your center of balance (when this happens, the tassel bounces around and hits you in the forehead).

4.  To distinguish them from hunting hats.

5.  To entice a bald eagle, who might think the tassel is a field mouse.  When the bald eagle flies in, you can then capture him, name him "Quanto" and train him to dive-bomb snowmobilers at the Birkie.

6.  If the tassel starts spinning quickly enough, it creates "lift" thus aiding your Birkie time (it also helps to pump your poles and skis full of Helium.

7.  The tassels are due to an ancient Nordic cross-country legend that has since been forgotten.

8.  Ummm....(I have to admit, the "exotic dancer" thing from suggestion one is causing me to auto-censor like mad....let me just say that I have seen some ski hats with TWO tassels).

9.  Because tassels are frickin' awesome and anybody who says different needs to get their face smashed in by a superbly conditioned cross-country skier.

10.  Why not?

Please, if you know the real reason, put it down in the comments!

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